wake up cursing and shut off alarm
stumble to bathroom and pee
put on slippers
take down baby gate, stagger to kitchen, let dogs out
empty dishwasher
microwave coffee water
let one dog in, let cat out
make coffee
let other dog in
take first round of pills
spill coffee on my night shirt (hence why I don’t get dressed until later)
let cat in
race down the hall trying to bet dogs to the bed
fail
pet dogs on the bed instead of making it
to to office, turn on light, and check to make sure no hamsters are caught in the bars of their cages
feed hamsters while thinking about starting a recycling container for uneaten hamster food but decide (again) there isn’t enough of it to do the wildlife any good.
internet w/ coffee
wake up zor
breakfast, usually a whole wheat english muffin with peanut butter, a banana, a boiled egg, and a glass of vegetable juice
pack my lunch
morning ablutions, dressing, and departure
drive to school
drop off zor at the main campus, drive to the other campus
attend school
pick up zor
drive home from school
homecoming with dogs scene where Cobie always has a nylabone in his mouth and a helicopter tail going on, and at some point he lets me (T-Moth also, when he comes home) take the bone and pretend to gnaw on it, crunch crunch crunch
let dogs out
avoid the sofa because there’s obviously a pygmy with a tranquilizer blow gun in it who shoots me in the ass every time I sit down
let one dog in and cat out
forget and sit on the sofa, and get shot in the ass by the evil sofa pygmy
fight off effects of blow gun dart, sometimes more effectively than others
let other dog in
family members who are not yet home begin to arrive, which inspires a nylabone-with-helicopter-tail scene re-enactment, and they almost immediately disperse to their separate dens and lairs
hate life because I have to get off the sofa and cook in spite of having been shot in the ass with a tranquilizer
let cat in
cobble together some kind of food (loving and admiring Regan the possessed stove in spite of everything)
chase cat off kitchen table a hundred and eleventy million times
family begins to emerge from dens and lairs
eat
clean up and load amazing dishwasher that actually fits things and gets them clean
retreat with husband to sofa for an hour of tv and companionship
let dogs out, in, out, in, out, in, out, in, out
go outside to see why dogs are barking
make dogs come in
award carrots
play indoor fetch with the ballistic boomerang
go to bed
award more treats
award self a sugar-free mint
read
break tiny remaining scrap of mint in half and share with dogs
sleep