i hate macs, the pity party

At school we use macs, where you save by hitting Command + S.

At home I use a PC, where I save by hitting Ctrl + S.

The mac’s CMD button and the PC’s Alt button are in approximately the same place.

So when I knew my hard drive was in death’s dooryard, I carefully backed everything up…except apparently I never saved the pages and pages of revisions to godlight‘s first chapter.  Except I suspect I did try to save it…by hitting Alt + S. 

Alt + S does not save anything.  😛

Then, I imagine, I closed the document and Word asked me if I wanted to save my changes and I hit NO because I hadn’t made any changes since the last time I saved, or so I thought.

Word is always doing that, and I always say NO because I imagine I’m saving some accidental keystrokes, or perhaps some touchpad shenanigans that I don’t want to save.  In Word, if you save, run a wordcount, and then close, it asks if you want to save your changes.  What changes!?

Anyhow, all those changes are gone, and have to be done over, and as I may have mentioned, I have zero time lately and I’m exhausted.

On one level I realize these are only a few pages of changes I’m talking about, but I am just so tired, and on the edge of despair all the time.  I feel like I will always be the B student in everything:  writing, school, housekeeping, dog guardianship.  I will never be a star at anything.

How can you be a writer if you can’t manage to do something so simple as save a document correctly?

Yes, I am feeling very sorry for myself at the moment.

I hate macs.

Also Word.

I’d give up, except I don’t know and can’t imagine what I’d do instead.